Tension

How much ten­sion can you stand? Are you an avoidant per­son­al­ity? Does every­thing have to make sense or be reduced to sim­plis­tic views so you can feel secure?

Over the years, I have worked with peo­ple that have all sorts of fears. I once worked with a young man that was unable to be more than 200 feet from his home. The coun­sel­ing was tedious. He believed more in his fears than in the free­dom pos­si­bil­i­ties of life itself. He was unable to deal with any ten­sion. His rejec­tion of the real­ity of ten­sion became inner tur­moil that kept him in a per­pet­ual sense of panic (how ironic).

A spir­i­tu­ally mature per­son knows how to live in the mid­dle of all sorts of fears, tensions, and con­tra­dic­tions. Life does not have to be a neat lit­tle story. Mature souls can be in the mix of com­pet­ing eth­nic­i­ties, con­tra­dic­tory philoso­phies, and cul­tural clashes — all the while being very relaxed and accept­ing. They are deeply dis­cern­ing - yet able to tran­scend all of the appar­ent chaos. In fact, they pre­fer the dis­par­i­ties to the uni­for­mi­ties. From the pieces that do not fit come cre­ative pos­si­bil­i­ties for the puz­zles of life.

Ten­sions can be neg­a­tive or pos­i­tive. We refer to the neg­a­tive ones as “thick enough that you can cut them with a knife.” Some ten­sions can empty a room (per­son­al­ity con­flicts) - oth­ers can fill it (the begin­ning of a con­cert). Ten­sions hold the poten­tials for con­fronting or embrac­ing. There is growth in both. Avoid­ing one or the other cheats us all.

All ten­sions demand courage. They are oppor­tu­ni­ties. Courage grows only by its repeated use. Rise to the occa­sion — what­ever it may be. Enjoy the impos­si­ble. Most of all, allow irre­solv­able ten­sions to be the tour guide of your own soul.