By Midlife

By midlife, you must have learned some key dynam­ics. Cer­tainly, you have learned to be more selec­tive. Your phys­i­cal ener­gies are not what they used to be, but your wis­dom is there to com­pen­sate (lighten up). You have been through enough pres­i­den­tial elec­tions to know that it is mostly show busi­ness (so relax). You have also learned to be sus­pi­cious of any­thing that begins with the word “new” (spend your money on the peo­ple you love — not things).
Though you can afford any­thing on the menu, your doc­tor has nar­rowed the choices to a few bland items (dine in style any­way). You can­not eat that entire large pizza by your­self in one sit­ting, like you did in high school or col­lege. What would once give you heart­burn can now give you a heart attack. You have come to respect the legit­i­mate needs of oth­ers, but have also noticed that you are no longer gullible when it comes to “poor me” sto­ries (espe­cially the well-rehearsed ver­sions designed to get into your wal­let).
Some­where between forty and sev­enty your rep­u­ta­tion as “nobody’s fool” should have been estab­lished. If you are still falling for the same gim­micks in your six­ties that you did in your twen­ties, then send me your name and address, I have some land to sell you in the south Pacific — and maybe a bridge or two.
Mid-life is the fork in the road between the per­ma­nent frowns and sub­tle smiles. Some eyes dull, while oth­ers twin­kle. You have rolled the dice between tragedy and com­edy. May you have rolled that which brings more laugh­ter than tears. If you have not found your­self by now, may I loan you a mir­ror? Self-reflection should not lead to self-absorption. Take a moment to look, and then get on with life. Stop pol­ish­ing the bumper and get on the road!
If you are read­ing this, and are not yet forty, con­sider what I have said as a hint. You are going to look like your aging par­ents some­day. You are even going to say some of the same things they are say­ing now. Roll your eyes now, because after sixty it hurts to do that too.